The Flying Wallendas display their confidence by not using a net. While that may seem a bit extreme, they train their entire lives to be ready for those key moments. I’m not suggesting you walk through life taking unnecessary risks, but building self confidence is really a balancing act between preparation and risk.

Most kids get comfortable enough on a bicycle to eventually ride no-handed. Even I did that. Hey, I was on the back of a tandem bike. My handle bars didn’t even move. It was my job to pedal. I had to trust my twin brother John, or anyone else who was on the front seat, to get us where we needed to go. I know there were times when John lifted his feet… just to drop a subtle hint that life wasn’t going to let me coast as a passenger. That’s one thing I love about a bike ride. It’s a lot of work getting up those hills, but the occasional coast – that’s just good fun.

Of course, sitting on the back of that tandem bike wasn’t as much fun as driving up front. I only drove that bike a few times. Once while driving with a brave friend on the back, we were having a conversation. Not thinking, I turned to say something and the next thing I knew – a parked car jumped out in front of us. Luckily there was no damage to the car, the bike, or either of us. We traded places and continued… laughing all the way.

After that, I was told not to ride on the front of that bike. Well, in my rule following, yet adventurously creative, mind, I found a way to obey that rule while still enjoying a bike ride (kids, please don’t try this at home). I leaned over from the back seat and grabbed the handle bars. I started to pedal from the back and steer with no one on the front seat. I rode around the court we lived in, and then I turned onto the side street. I got to that corner and turned around. As I was approaching the court, I only had one more house to pass… Whitey’s house. He was sitting on his front porch just watching me. Of course, I didn’t see him, but boy did I hear him.

WHITEY: (yelling) “Jimmy! Does your Dad know how you’re riding that bike!?”

I didn’t say anything. I couldn’t. I was too busy concentrating on steering because my crazy neighbor just scared the crap out of me. All I could think was, “Don’t crash” and “My Dad’s gonna clobber me” and “Hmm, in that case, maybe I should crash”. I began to weave, feverishly trying to keep my composure, and when I had safely arrived in my own driveway, I decided not to ride like that anymore.

Fast forward about 20 years. My wife Barb and I bought mountain bikes for each other as a one year anniversary gift. We had a great time going for bike rides. A few years later, shortly after our daughter Courtney was born, we bought a baby seat that attaches to the back of a bike. Barb suggested putting it on my bike. She was confident that I’d be OK, and more importantly that Courtney (too young to protest) would be fine too. Having ridden for years, I too had grown in my self confidence to the point where I could carry my precious little passenger.

Once we moved to Arizona, both our kids eventually learned to ride bikes too. We live across from a court, so they had a safe place to practice and build their self confidence. Barb and I enjoyed watching them ride, and it inspired us to get our own bikes again and ride with our kids. On a nice Arizona January day we went for a family bike ride. It was such a beautiful sunny Sunday afternoon, I even brought the dog.

Have you ever noticed that sometimes overconfidence is a dangerous thing? I’m painfully reminded of that every time I think back on that January bike ride. Since I could ride one handed, I volunteered to hold the dog’s leash (OK kids, here’s another one – please don’t try this at home). I held the leash as he ran beside me. We had done this before, and he would just bolt down the sidewalk next to me as I rode in the street.

To this day, I’m not sure why, but for some reason he darted in front of me, so I applied the brakes – or should I say… the front brake (note to self – when riding one-handed keep the back break hand on the handle bars). At that moment, I became a Flying Leligdon! In one not at all graceful move, I let go of the leash, flew over the handle bars, and did my best Evel Knievel impression. Every body part on my right side hit the pavement (and I’ve had pavement plant experience… see part 2 of this blog). To this day I thank God that when I landed I didn’t hit my head because, unlike my bus jumping buddy, I was not wearing a helmet. Oh, and my dog, like a ninja he very wisely moved out of the way so I wouldn’t land on him. Then he sat by me waiting for Barb and the kids to come back.

As a result of that January bike ride, I could have decided to stop riding my bike (or at least to learn how to stop WHILE riding my bike). I took a look at how to be better prepared before I rode again. I always wear a helmet – It’s OK to be safe. I’ve had people say that a grown man doesn’t need a bike helmet because it looks stupid – Really? It looks better than bashing my head on the pavement. I leave the dog at home because… dogs go for walks not bike rides. I even go for short rides in the neighborhood by myself to further build my confidence.

Remember my rule following, yet adventurously creative, mind? One day I rode to the Pharmacy Drive-thru at Walgreen’s just because I could, and it was fun being in line with the cars. Hey, it’s a drive-thru, and it doesn’t specify what I need to be driving.

Tennis pro Arthur Ashe said, “One important key to success is self confidence. An important key to self confidence is preparation”. What about you? In your own life, what’s one area where you’d like to be more successful? How are you preparing your self… confidence for success?